Ready, set, go

Ready, set, go [1]

Set a timer for ten minutes. Open a new post. Start the timer, and start writing. When the timer goes off, publish.

So a few days back, I had a discussion with a friend about desirability. She had said, “Who would want this?” She tapped her belly for emphasis. I shook my head. The subject shifted before I could collect my thoughts.

How do I explain to her that desirability is different from being attractive? How do I say that those two are different things, when our society tells us, every single waking moment, the contrary? I won’t get into the Vanity/Thin/Pretty = Shallow argument, because frankly that is a tired thing we like to kick around whenever somebody has the audacity to call somebody else fat in public.

Desirability is your ability to be wanted, to be lusted after. Being attractive is the first thing people notice, I concede that, but that doesn’t mean that that’s the only thing they see.

Desirability is more of a reflection of how you see yourself. Of how much you think you are worth. I think that’s one of the hardest things to convey, especially to somebody who has been convinced that you have to be so and so pounds to deserve a fulfilling relationship. If attractiveness really is the only thing to it, then my pretty, smart, and awesome friends wouldn’t have date-related problems, now would they?

1. Writing prompt from The Daily Post.


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